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Order
a Parent Action Kit
This easy-to-read guide includes three folders, each
containing a section on What You Should Know and What You Can Do.
The Kit gives guidance for selecting age-appropriate, nonviolent toys and games;
suggests helpful books and organizations; and provides tips for resolving family
conflicts peacefully.
Here is a list of the
topics covered in each section of the Kit:
"T"
is for Television,
"V" is for Violence
Simple Things Parents Can Do to
Protect Children from Media Violence |
Violent
Toys Are Not
Child's Play
Transforming Children's War
Chests Back into Toy Chests |
Resolving
Family Conflicts Peacefully
Handling Conflicts and Anger at
Home and on the Playground |
| Part
One includes: Violent Children's Entertainment: Just Good Clean Fun?
How Young Children Learn to Be Violent
Killing as Entertainment: The Lessons of Violent Video Games
"I Grew Up Watching Westerns, and I'm Not a Mass
Murderer": Why Should I Worry About What My Children Watch?
Who Says TV Is too Violent? A Family Quiz Game on Media Violence
Plugging In the "P" Chip: How Parents Can Take Charge
of the Television Set
How to Talk with Young Children About TV Violence
Creating New Rules, and Sticking with Them
Things to Do When You Hear "I'm Bored!"
Resources: Books, Organizations and Quality Children's Videos |
Part
Two includes: How Do Your Children Play? A Quick Home Inventory
Before Buying Toys: Some Questions to Consider
I Don't Buy Violent Toys - But What If My Children Make Their
Own?
The Merchants of Violence: Pandering to Pint-Sized Consumers
Now Rules for Violent Toys
Dealing with Violent Toys Outside Your Home
Ideas for Parent Groups
Ideas for Religious Groups
Finding Books and Toys for Peaceful Play |
Part
Three includes: Who Will Teach the Children About Nonviolence?
Between Parent and Child: Tips for Managing Conflict
When Children Fight: What's a Parent to Do?
Dealing with Anger: No Laughing Matter
What About Discipline? Some Questions to Consider
Things to Say When You're Feeling Angry
Intervening on Behalf of Children: Some Options
Helping Your Community Improve the Lives of Children
Dealing with Bullies
Creating a Peaceful Home: A Bibliography for Parents and Stories
for Children
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Introduction
to
Part One |
Introduction
to
Part Two |
Introduction
to
Part Three |

Order a Parent Action Kit
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An Introduction to the
Parent Action Kit |
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Part 1 -
"T"
is for Television, "V" is for Violence:
Simple Things Parents Can Do to Protect Children from
Media Violence.
oes television violence really affect
children's behavior? The answer to this question is a resounding YES.
Hundreds of studies in more than a dozen countries have all come
to the same conclusion: Children who watch violent television programs behave
more aggressively than children who do not.
Within the scientific community, there is no longer any debate
about this relationship. Three major national studies reviewed hundreds of
individual studies "to arrive at the irrefutable conclusion that
viewing violence increases violence" (Report of the American
Psychological Association Commission on Violence and Youth, 1992).
The three comprehensive national studies, spanning a period of
more than 25 years, were conducted by:
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The Surgeon General's Commission in 1972
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The National Institute of Mental Health in 1982
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The American Psychological Association in 1992.
This last report concluded that "children's exposure to
violence in the mass media, particularly at young ages, can have harmful
lifelong consequences."
But how is television violence different from the violence that
has always existed -- say in Bible stories or in fairy tales? There are some
important differences:
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The sheer number of acts of violence on television far outstrips
those in any story.
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Television includes a visual component. Not only do you
hear about the violent action, you SEE it.
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Television is an integral part of children's everyday lives and
mixes real scenes with imaginary ones. It is impossible for children to
determine when "story time" ends and real life begins.
This
section of the Parent Action Kit contains summaries of some of the key research
studies regarding television violence and its effect on children -- so you can
come to your own conclusions.
This folder also includes:
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a family quiz game on media violence
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suggestions for minimizing the amount of violent television your
children watch
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a list of activities for TV-free hours
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suggested resource books and information about how to find
quality, nonviolent children's videos.
Many of the issues discussed here also apply to violence in
movies, on computer and video games, at arcade parlors, and on the Internet. You
can adapt the suggestions in the What You Can Do section to deal with any of
these other media.
Part 2 -
Violent
Toys are not Children's Play:
Transforming Children's War Chests Back into Toy
Chests.
f you are concerned about violent
toys and how they affect your children's behavior, this section of the Parent
Action Kit is for you.
Here you will find some basic information about the relationship
between children, toys, and aggression; resources for finding games and toys
that promote positive values; and suggestions for dealing with violent toys.
Growing numbers of parents are finding that when children have
violent toys such as swords, toy guns, and action figures, they play violently.
The toy industry itself, in a publication called Toys and
Play published by the Toy Manufacturers of
America, states that play is "the way children learn about themselves,
their environment, and the people around them.... Learning to cooperate,
negotiate, take turns, and play by the rules are all important skills learned in
early games. It is through imaginative play that the child begins to learn
some of the roles and rules of society."
What roles and rules do violent toys teach children? What
lessons do children learn when playing with a toy gun? What values are promoted
by "action" figures?
This section of the Parent Action Kit will help you answer these
questions for yourself by providing:
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a list of questions to consider before buying toys
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a checklist for observing what your own children learn from
their toys
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suggestions for reducing the number of violent toys in your home
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and other resources.
Part 3 -
Resolving
Family Conflicts Peacefully:
Handling Conflicts and Anger at Home and on the
Playground.
eaching children how to deal with
conflict is one of the most difficult things a parent is ever called upon to do.
This is because, when learning about conflict, children really do learn from
what we do -- not from what we say.
If our own style is angry or confrontational, our children are
unlikely to learn to resolve their conflicts in a positive way. If we are
serious about raising peaceful children, we need to learn to become more
peaceful parents. For most of us, this is an enormous challenge -- especially if
we did not have good role models in our own lives.
But in a nation that is becoming increasingly dangerous and
violent, it is crucial for parents to teach their young children skills
and behaviors that avoid (rather than provoke) a violent response to conflict.
The American Psychological Association has concluded that
violence is a learned behavior, and it is learned very early in life.
Of course, children have a unique personality from birth, and
some behave more
aggressively than others. But it is up to adults to teach children that
aggression is not the best way to solve problems and that aggressive behavior
will not be tolerated.
Teaching children how to deal constructively with conflict -- be
it with a friend, a sibling, a classmate, or a parent -- is one of the greatest
gifts you can ever give them. In moments of crisis, it might even save their
lives!
This portion of the Parent Action Kit aims to help you improve
some of your own skills in managing conflicts. In addition, it provides some
suggestions for helping your children with problem-solving skills.
This kit is just a beginning. The resources listed in this
folder can give you much more information and support.
Changing old habits is not easy. It takes time -- in fact, lots
of time. A behavior pattern that took months or years to establish could take
even longer to change. So don't be surprised if some of the methods presented
here don't work the first or second time you try them. Be patient with your
children, your partner, and -- most of all -- with yourself.
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